"A Plea to the Church and the Ones Struggling"...a twloha reblog
To the Church:
I know you’re trying.
You’re trying to help, trying to understand.
You’re acknowledging that depression is something that happens.
Maybe some of you have even experienced it yourself. Maybe some of you might be experiencing it right now.
If you are, I wouldn’t be surprised if you haven’t told anybody about it.
Thank you for all that you’ve done, but please know that there’s still more work to do.
It’s time to come alongside.
To those struggling:
The Church has the best of intentions. It’s trying to help, trying to understand, even if it feels like it’s just…not getting it. Not quite yet. When news of a celebrity suicide breaks, you listen closely for it to be broached in conversation, waiting to see if somebody’s going to be brave enough to talk about it first. During the service, you keep your ears perked for a prayer request for the celebrity’s family. You wait for something, anything… But there’s no prayer request, no mention of it.
To you, the one struggling, it feels like the elephant in the room. You wonder if others feel the same way. You can’t believe you’re the only one struggling.
But you’d never know – until one day it’s the topic of hushed conversation. Word gets out. Somebody is depressed.
What does that mean for them? The whispers want to know.
They love Jesus, don’t they?
They have a relationship with him, right?
Aren’t Christians supposed to be joyful?
If they’ve dedicated their life to Jesus, is it even possible to be depressed?
To the Church:
It is. Take it from me—one of you, one that loves you, one that’s grateful for the home that you’ve given me. I have been well-loved by you, but I never opened up about my struggle until after I was sure it was over. It’s possible for a Christian to be depressed because I have been. An unsettling amount of people that I’ve opened up to about it, many of whom also love Jesus, have told me that they’ve struggled with depression as well. Some of them are still struggling.
According to the Canadian Mental Health Association, one in five Canadians will “personally experience a mental illness in their lifetime.” Depression doesn’t care where you’re from or what your job is or how old you are or what you believe. It just comes. I know that you’re trying to understand. And I know that it’s hard to understand something that, oftentimes, just doesn’t make sense.
We don’t have to understand it, though, to bear with someone who is going through it.
To those struggling:
You have already been remarkably brave for making it this far, and I am proud of you. I want you to know that.
However, I need you to be a little bit braver. Not just to help yourself, but also to help the ones who will come after you—the ones who, too, will feel like they can’t talk about it and the ones who know that they are loved but are afraid of the response that they will get if they share.
If you are struggling, right now, please speak up.
Don’t wait until after it’s over. Don’t wait until it’s an amazing part of your testimony where God came through—and he will come through. If the Church is to learn how to come alongside a person who is struggling with depression, then it must be through experience. Simply hearing about it in an abstract sense isn’t enough. It doesn’t compare at all to the personal experience, and personal experience might just be what the Church needs to hear to be able to come alongside you—and those coming after you—well.
To the Church:
I’ve asked those who are struggling to be brave to bridge this gap, so I’m going to ask you to be brave, too.
Don’t pretend this is something that’s not happening in your congregation.
Don’t be afraid to talk about it. If you’ve struggled in the past, open up about it. Ask for prayer during the service. If you’re preaching, talk about Elijah, who became suicidal after the biggest spiritual experience he’d ever had at the top of Mount Carmel. Talk about Job, who just didn’t understand why everything was taken away from him. Talk about his friends, who should’ve just stayed silent and been with him instead of offering their two cents. Talk about David, who escaped to Philistia when he felt God had abandoned him.
Just talk about it. You, least of all you, should be surprised by the power that words can hold.
You can help. You can help create a safe environment for those who are struggling. You can help bring about healing.
To those struggling:
Christians get depressed. You’re not alone.
To the Church/those struggling:
We can do this.
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