The Rhythms of His Heart

I sit beside her on a bench in the school gym. Tears filled her eyes as she looked at me & says "Deanna, I just want to go to heaven now!  This girl was not even ten years old, but she had been taunted, & torn into pieces verbally & emotionally by her peers. She wants an easy escape from the hurt & the pain.  My heart hurts for her...God, why don't we value people...why can't everyone see that all people are YOURS...precious & loved! I sit beside her at a table in the drop-in...She told me that her mother--the very woman who gave birth to her called her stupid, said she didn't love her &  that she would never be anything.  So she wanders around trying to find acceptance & love in her boyfriend, friends, partying...whatever!!  Again my heart hurts as I tell her that God says She IS loved, She DOES have a purpose....and can find all the love she needs if she'd turn to Jesus! I sit listening to him as he shares that people have tore him d

Yesterday I was sent this link by a precious woman of God and forever friend!  I have read it a few times since & each time I realized that I need to see myself how God sees me...BEAUTIFUL!  Then I thought of some of the girls that I work with & my heart hurt for them...if only they could see that they are beautiful and stop listening to the lies that we are told.  If only I could believe it in my own life!  So click on the link below and read it...believe it....pray through it and know that you are beautiful in the eyes of our Daddy God! http://www.aholyexperience.com/2012/09/what-women-need-to-say-to-each-other-because-its-what-ever-woman-needs-to-hear/

Making  disciples is not an easy process.  It is trying.  It is  messy.  It is slow, tedious, even painful at times.  It is  all these things because it is relational.  Jesus has not  given us an effortless step-by-step formula for  impacting nations for his glory.  He has given us  people, and he has said, “Live for them.  Love them,  serve them, and lead them.  Lead them to follow me,  and lead them to lead others to follow me.  In the  process you will multiply the gospel to the ends of the  earth."  David Platt from his book   Radical I found the above quote "creeping" facebook last night & BAM! it hit me.  The last week has been filled with moments where I keep asking myself is what I am doing really making a difference?  In my week of  crusty lasangas (prepared for a Girl's Night),  people not showing up, getting tired & things not happening the way I planned....still I am called to "Live for them. Love them, serve them and lead them.&q

It is the middle of August already! Soon the days of heat, beaches, shorts, BBQ's and no school will be over!  Sad I know, & even after being out of school for this long I still get that sick, "It's over" kind of a feeling when I walk into a store or see in a flyer the big bold letters "BACK TO SCHOOL"! Still, after these lazy, hazy, days of summer and in the busyness of all the summer activity I am thankful that my mission here is not over!  This is just the beginning & already there have been days when I think, "Really God??  Are You sure You picked the right girl for this job?"  & He reminds me "This is not about YOU, Dee...It is about ME working out MY plan...Don't grow weary...just do all I've asked you to do. If I can use a stone to kill a giant I can use a weak, timid, disabled girl to fight off (through MY power) the "giants" that come to taunt the Youth in Portage." On those days too, when I feel t

Whoa!  It's been over a month since I blogged...CRAZY!!  My summer days so far have been filled with a one week trip to New Brunswick,  & a wedding in Maine &  back again to "dive in " to the fun summer activities that we have planned to do with the Youth here in Portage.  God has been so good!!  Camp outs, boating/tubing, Splash Island (outdoor water park) days, small groups, building relationships, listening to hurts, praying & giving of myself is... I am going to be real with you---EXHAUSTING!!  Many nights I come home (slightly "sun-kissed")  & just crash.  How do I keep going?  Do I need more than just the highs of my beloved morning coffee to keep me going? YES, YES & YES! *HIS WORD IS WHERE I FIND ALL I NEED!* This week I have been studying the widow of Zarephath in I Kings 17:8-16.  This lady was at the end of her rope...her husband died, there was a famine, & she only had enough flour to feed her & her son one last time.  S

Everyday I pray that God would give me opportunities/courage to love, speak Truth & just listen to the Youth here as they come into "The Factory"(YFC drop-in).  Today, however I believe that God showed me that He can work even in the silence. From across the room as I was getting my lunch ready I noticed him.  He looked tired & just plain angry--upset with the world & annoyed!  As music blared from his headphones, I felt a nudge in my heart to just try to start a conversation.  I went over with my lunch & said "Hey ________! Can I sit here?" There was no response...not even a grunt or a groan...he didn't even acknowledge me!  So I tried again..."Are you okay, how ya doing?"  I still got NOTHING!!  At first I was a little frustrated...and annoyed!  Then something clicked & I began to think about this kid and all the disappointments/hurts/pains he could be dealing with and my heart  was moved to pray!  Prayer is a ministry that we

Some of you may be shocked at this blog title & asking yourself ,"Why would Dee use this as her blog title?"  Well, let me tell you...partying, sex & drugs was the answer that I got from the youth here when I asked them what there was to do for fun in Portage!  At first I was kind of  surprised/shocked, but then I realized that it is so real not just here in Portage, but everywhere!!  Today's Youth are looking for value & fulfillment in partying it up, sleeping with a guy or girl & the high that comes from smoking weed!!  So now the challenge comes...how do I let them see that these "thrills" are just temporary?  How do I let them see that they are valued & precious to God & were created for a purpose?  Pray for me that I will be able to help them see that Jesus is all they need...& please talk & be real with the Youth where you are....they need the love of Jesus to be poured into them!

Ok so I am officially from Portage la Prairie, Manitoba!!!  Woot, Woot!!  These last few days have been crazy...I have met a lot of new people, moved in to my new apartment, learned(am learning) to drive (or crash) my new scooter & I have moved to a new city!  There have been many sweet moments with me & God---many tears, many cries for help & patience as I learn to deal with this new transition in my life.  You see, I am a girl who likes to be comfortable, who has trouble with change, who fears being rejected when meeting new people, & who never is far from her friends & family....BUT GOD is changing me!!!  I am totally out of my comfort zone, am meeting tons of new people & moved across Canada....Oh yes, God is changing me! And though these days have been difficult...I would not change anything!!!  It's just me & God taking one day at a time :)

We (God & I) have come to the point in this incredible journey where there is  a set date as to when I am leaving for Portage La Prairie to join YFC.  On Thursday, May 3rd I fly out of Halifax!!  It is here...I am scared, nervous, excited for all that is to come, but KNOW that I am not alone....my God, my Constant, my Rock, my Daddy God will hold me & be with me!  Thank you all for your prayers & keep praying!!!  Here is a song that is kind of become my song of the week....no matter where I go I am in HIS arms.

God uses strange things sometimes to bring me where I need to be.  This past week has been crazy with finding out that things are coming together for moving & flying plus all the other things that I have to do before I go.  Sometimes I get so focused on MY schedule, MY time, MY life that I forget to stop and just breathe and say "Thanks God"  It is during these moments that God uses things to get my attention.  Here are some of those things this week:   This week had to have a routine blood test!  How exciting, right?  I walked in took my number & sat down.  I began to hear the impatient complaints of the people around me...."Man, I've been here for a half hour and my number still hasn't been called!  There is NEVER a good time to come to this place, " I heard another lady say as she left.  I sat there wanting to join in...I had things to do, Dad was waiting for me, I just wanted it done & over with!!  Then God brought a thought to my heart...Th

So earlier today I blogged a prayer request for you all to pray about me getting accepted to live in an accessible apartment in Portage....well I got a phone call this afternoon that I am accepted!!!!  GOD IS SO GOOD & THANKS FOR YOUR PRAYERS!!!  I AM BLESSED & OVERWHELMED.....Dancing on the inside :)

Hey brothers & sisters, I need you to pray about a housing option that has come up for me in Portage La Prairie!  I have applied to live in an apartment that is accessible &  is at a very close distance to the YFC  mission/drop-in where I'll be working.  I have yet to hear back from them, but would like you all to pray that this would work out & if not that God would give me patience & willingness to follow His best for me!  Thanks for the prayers & keep 'em coming!! Matthew 6:8 "Be not ye therefore like unto them: for your Father knoweth what things ye have need of, before ye ask him."

 If you haven't received my latest newsletter....Here it is :) My dear friends & family, March 2012 I am so incredibly grateful for all of you & how God has been using you to be a part of what He is doing in my life. Yes, God is using you! I could not do this without your prayers, encouragement & financial support! There have been days throughout this waiting/fund-raising process that I wake up & say, “What am I doing...why am I even doing this?” It is those days that God in His goodness uses your prayers, encouraging notes, words & support to get me through. Many of you have been asking/ wondering what I have been up to and how things are going so here's what's been happening. “ Heart Sharing” in the Moncton Area On Sunday, February 5 I had the privilege of singing & sharing about my adventure with YFC at two churches in the Moncton, NB area. Middlesex Baptist Church is where I was for the morning service & it was so

Today is Good Friday & I got goose bumps as watched this video again!!!  Jesus is my Savior & King....do you know Him?

The past weekend I got to spend time with some friends that I met at a camp in the South Shore of Nova Scotia!  I know that it is by no accident that they were put into my life those many years ago...they are some of the biggest encouragers & prayer supporters in my life.  Whenever we have been together I always come away refreshed & strengthened spiritually. I walked into the home where I was staying & there on the wall hung a huge sign that said "We'll miss you" & I had to bite my lip to hold back the tears as they placed my brand new crutches in my hands.  This is how they chose to support me & hold me up :) as I begin my ministry with YFC...and all I could think was Thank You Lord for these gifts--my friends! We then took the next day & went to visit places that I would not get to see out in Manitoba....we went to the beach!! Yes, it was COLD, but sunny and yet again as we took pictures & took in the beautiful ocean scene...I thought Th

"Deanna, being faithful is way more important than being successful--be faithful not just successful!" I sat at my table over lunch on Sunday with a New Tribes missionary who is a passionate servant of Jesus.  Though he is older now the wisdom he has passed on & the encouragement he and his wife have been to me is such a blessing!  He said the above words to encourage me as I am at the beginning stages of my ministry with YFC &  haven't been able to get them out of my head all week. I have decided that at the end of the day it does not matter how much money I have in my pocket, how much I am liked by people around me,  or all the education I've had, what matters is that I have been faithful to where God has called me.  I don't want to give in when the going gets tough, when I've messed up, when I don't see immediate results, when I can't count converts or feel like I am all alone.  I am in this for the long haul & I can't wait for the

Jim & Tamara Ritskes, Me, Brother Jeff & my Mom & Dad This past weekend (Feb. 24-27) was full of blessings & excitement!  It was so awesome to have Jim & Tamara Ritskes fly in from Portage La Prairie.  They are such a great couple & are so genuine in their walk and service for God.  I appreciate them & their support through this whole thing...thankful that God placed them in my life.  I  am so excited to work alongside them both....they have become more than just the ED of YFC and his wife, but  they have become friends!  As I heard the presentations & sharing about YFC on Sunday, my heart is ready to go in God's time!  Keep on praying that I'll be there by April! Jim Ritskes --ED of YFC Portage & my Dad/Pastor praying over me. Big Brother Jeff singing   The weekend was also a special time where my church family prayed over & commissioned me.  It was so special again to have my Pastor/Dad & Jim pray over me.  I was brough

The above pictures were taken so I could make a prayer card to send to my supporters!  I'm not going to share the one I chose....It's a surprise :)  So before you think I'm full of myself....let me leave you with one of my  favorite quotes -- "Jesus is my beauty. He is my lovliness, my confidence. He is the charisma, the attractiveness that is right and true--that breeds life not death. That points to good and not evil.  The perfume the world, our family, and friends will take notice of.  What is she wearing? Jesus. The answer must be Jesus."

Have you ever just been floating through your day and then out of no where God sends something or someone to kind of give you a "slap" or a wake up call.  These two videos did it for me tonight!!  Sitting here with a lump in my throat and a tear in my eye....Oh what God can do if we just stop making excuses & just do what HE wants! The Following  2 links are a Testimony (Part 1 & 2) of Mark Hall. http://youtu.be/F8QO5oib-sM http://youtu.be/XdN581xZJmc He doesn't need us, but He wants us!  

INCREASE MY {OUR} FAITH. (Luke 17:5) January 2012 Dear Family & Friends, This new year of 2012 has started with some exciting things that God is doing! I have thought a lot about how this year will mean a lot of changes for me. Though it may be hard. my heart continues to cry out to my God and ask Him to increase my faith. As you read on, you will see how HE has been doing this! I am OVERWHELMED . . . Several weeks ago you all received a letter announcing the journey God is leading me on with YFC in Portage la Prairie, Manitoba. This has been a long road & I am still overwhelmed that God has chosen me to serve Him and impact other's lives for Him as a full-time Female Youth Mentor. I also have been overwhelmed by those of you who have committed to supporting me through prayer & finances. Many times over the last weeks there have been many tears, laughs & shouts of praise to God for how HE has provided in ways that continue to blow me away. I am THANKF

Looking through some pictures of my visit last spring to YFC Portage....thought you might like to see them.  This is where it will all happen....God, make me ready!!   Skate shop right next door...YFC uses skateboarding as an outreach....Skaters  love Jesus too! "The Factory": Mission office & drop-in center Tupper Street Where YFC Portage office/drop-in is located. "The Door" is a housing unit that YFC rents to have to do activities with women & kids in the area.  It also houses a clothing bank to help those in need.

H ere is a great song that has encouraged me so much this week.  Read the lyrics & hit the link at the end to hear it on youtube.com. im so forgetful, but you always remind me youre the only one who brings me peace youre the only one who brings me peace so i come, lord i come, i come, lord i come to tell you i love you to tell you i need you to tell you theres no better place for me than in your arms to tell you im sorry for running in circles for placing my focus on the ways and not your face youre the only one who brings me peace youre the only one who brings me peace im so forgetful but you always remind me youre the only one who brings me peace x2 so i come lord i come i come lord i come to tell you i love you to tell you i need you to tell you theres no better place for me than in your arms to tell you im sorry for running in circles for placing my focus on the ways and not your face youre the only one who brings me peace youre the only one who br

Genesis 21   19 Just then God opened her eyes. She looked. She saw a well of water. She went to it and filled her canteen and gave the boy a long, cool drink.  (You should read Gen. 21:8-21 to get the whole story....so good!) Sometimes I feel like Hagar (See Gen.21).  I feel hopeless, rejected, used, thirsty, alone & just wanting to run away. Yes,  I go through these dry, desert/wilderness times.  I just want to cry & give up, but in these times God  shows up just as He did with Hagar.  He knows & sees what's going on...& I don't have to be afraid & I can cling to His plan & purpose.  It makes me wonder though how often do I miss those times when God wants to show Himself because my eyes were too focused on my 'hopless' situation?  God longs to show up & give us the water that will quench our thirst...He longs for us to trust & cling to Him & His promises! But are my eyes blinded to the ways He is working? My heart's cry this we

‎ "Anyone who comes to me but refuses to let go of father, mother, spouse, children, brothers, sisters—yes, even one's own self!—can't be my disciple. Anyone who won't shoulder his own cross and follow behind me can't be my d isciple." The above Words of Jesus have hit me hard over the last few days...yesterday I had to "let go" of my little brother & watch him head out on a plane to start his journey on to Uganda, Tanzania & Kenya, AFRICA!!  I am so proud of him & his desire for God and to be used by Him, but it was really hard!!  We are super close & my heart hurt not because I don't support him, not because I don't believe that God is going to use Him, but because I find it so hard to let go.  Yet, God kept speaking to me as if to say...You need to let go...he's in My hands!  So the night/day my brother left I prayed with open hands, "Dear God & Africa I give you my brother..."   I know God is going to

I am so overwhelmed by how God is working out details in this adventure with YFC & thought I should share how He has been working.  He is definitely is proving over & over again that He will do ABOVE all that we ask or even think!! PRAISE GOD #1 : Since sending out my 1st prayer letter I am so thankful for the many people who have given support and are praying!!  I am humbled by supporters telling me how they are giving up things like call waiting &  part of their own missionary support to give to YFC and God's ministry with me!!  SO THANKFUL! PRAISE GOD # 2: I had been praying for a mobility scooter so that I could get to the mission office/drop-in safer & easier when I move to Portage.  I was looking and found that a new one would cost ALOT!!  A few weeks ago I got a call & I was offered a mobility scoooter for FREE!!  SO OVERWHELMED! PRAISE GOD #3: In November, my forearm crutches broke & were not usable.  I was so disappointed, but was given some t

I am SO in Love!! I am in a relationship with a Man that knows what I need before I ask.  He knows everything about me, yes everything & get this He still loves me!!  This past Christmas & New Year have reminded me of how blessed I am to have a personal relationship with Jesus. This relationship goes beyond any family or friend relationship (though they are great).  This relationship is one that is all about Him....I don't deserve Him, and yet He has chosen to set His love on me & rejoice over me!!!  Crazy I know, But all I can say is "I'm in love!"  I Love my Savior--Jesus Christ! He is definitely the "PERFECT MAN" He is my Lover & loves me with an everlasting love.   He is my Friend that sticks closer than a brother. He is my Strength when I am weak He is my Beauty when the world says I'm ugly He is my Rock when life crumbles around me He is the Supplier of my needs when I ask