"Cry Baby!" or "Cry, Baby!"
I've always felt emotion on a deep level. Besides keeping the tissue companies in business, I have learned/am learning that the emotion that seems to fall so quickly out of my eyes is an ok thing! I am getting to the place in my life where I no longer want to say, "I'm sorry!" when tears start to form! It is a freeing thing for me...and yet this post will be super honest in letting you know that it hasn't been an easy process. This post is for the feelers...the messy criers...the Kleenex people! TEARS ARE GOOD!!!
Before I go on I must say that this post is not to shame the' dry eyed' friends. Just as much as I have learned that it is ok to cry, I know that just because someone does not show visible affects of their emotion does not mean that they do not care or feel. In the past I think I have judged that too quickly, but now choose to celebrate the difference in the way people process their emotions. For me...its tears usually, but for you it may be different and that's ok! I am sure glad that we all emote differently because if everyone did it like me...phew pretty sure God would tell us to build a boat because there would be an ocean of tears! I cry when I am angry, sad, frustrated, empathizing, sympathizing, worshiping and laughing. It happens...and the part of me that used to hold things in is finding healing, truth and permission to let the tears flow.
Why was I...Why are we afraid of crying? This is the question that I had to come to grips with. I have spent most of my days afraid of letting my tears come because I was afraid of how people would see me. I was afraid that people would write me off as just another emotional woman! I was a shameful mess. I always felt that I needed to get over what I was feeling...that I had to "Suck it Up!" I felt what I felt didn't matter and to be this strong, unshakable woman I needed to "Stop being a CRY BABY!" Whoa. Sounds like I bought in to a lie, huh? Many of us (including me) have used those statements when dealing with someone who expresses themselves through tears...and though I don't think that our lives should be guided by feelings that are flippy floppy....I neither think it good to downplay, ignore or stuff our feelings. Feeling and emotions are gifts given by the Good Good Father to show us our hearts. It is part of being created in His image! God feels! Yes, Yes He does and He gave us emotion to be expressed in a healthy way! He gets angry, He weeps, He loves, He delights! He gets it when I can't even talk because tears are coming! He gets it when I am so mad and the tears come! He gets it when I experience grief and loss and the tears just flow! He gets it when I am overwhelmed by the Father's goodness that the tears stream down! Tears are never too much for Him. You don't have to explain or make Him comfortable with the messy cry...because He understands!
Recently I was processing things before the Lord...and that fear of being called a "Cry Baby!" came to my mind! It turned quickly into permission from Him to cry! The voice calling out and accusing me of being a Cry Baby was now switched to the voice of my Daddy-God saying, "Cry, Baby...its ok!" I can be real with Him...I can cry and its not awkward!! Talk about freedom!!!! YAHOO! I let myself feel and understand why I feel the way I do and then speak Truth to that place!
So in the every day...sometimes tears fall faster and then slower other days. If you are with me and the tears come...don't panic! They will stop! Please know though that I don't need you to fix the problem...I don't need you to make me laugh...I don't need you to really say anything. Just sit with me...hand me a Kleenex and wait until or if I'm ready to share my heart! My tears are ok and they are just pieces of my heart coming out through my eyes. If you still don't understand then that's ok...because my Jesus understands! He will always invite me/us to "Cry, Baby!" Isn't that the best gift?
To my fellow feeler,
I give you permission to cry! Let the tears come! It is not weakness...it is strength! Embrace the gift that has been given to us to feel deeply! Don't write off those who don't feel like you...or maybe even misunderstand you! Stop ignoring and shrugging off this beautiful gift that we have been given! CRY, BABY...IT'S OK!
Before I go on I must say that this post is not to shame the' dry eyed' friends. Just as much as I have learned that it is ok to cry, I know that just because someone does not show visible affects of their emotion does not mean that they do not care or feel. In the past I think I have judged that too quickly, but now choose to celebrate the difference in the way people process their emotions. For me...its tears usually, but for you it may be different and that's ok! I am sure glad that we all emote differently because if everyone did it like me...phew pretty sure God would tell us to build a boat because there would be an ocean of tears! I cry when I am angry, sad, frustrated, empathizing, sympathizing, worshiping and laughing. It happens...and the part of me that used to hold things in is finding healing, truth and permission to let the tears flow.
Why was I...Why are we afraid of crying? This is the question that I had to come to grips with. I have spent most of my days afraid of letting my tears come because I was afraid of how people would see me. I was afraid that people would write me off as just another emotional woman! I was a shameful mess. I always felt that I needed to get over what I was feeling...that I had to "Suck it Up!" I felt what I felt didn't matter and to be this strong, unshakable woman I needed to "Stop being a CRY BABY!" Whoa. Sounds like I bought in to a lie, huh? Many of us (including me) have used those statements when dealing with someone who expresses themselves through tears...and though I don't think that our lives should be guided by feelings that are flippy floppy....I neither think it good to downplay, ignore or stuff our feelings. Feeling and emotions are gifts given by the Good Good Father to show us our hearts. It is part of being created in His image! God feels! Yes, Yes He does and He gave us emotion to be expressed in a healthy way! He gets angry, He weeps, He loves, He delights! He gets it when I can't even talk because tears are coming! He gets it when I am so mad and the tears come! He gets it when I experience grief and loss and the tears just flow! He gets it when I am overwhelmed by the Father's goodness that the tears stream down! Tears are never too much for Him. You don't have to explain or make Him comfortable with the messy cry...because He understands!
Recently I was processing things before the Lord...and that fear of being called a "Cry Baby!" came to my mind! It turned quickly into permission from Him to cry! The voice calling out and accusing me of being a Cry Baby was now switched to the voice of my Daddy-God saying, "Cry, Baby...its ok!" I can be real with Him...I can cry and its not awkward!! Talk about freedom!!!! YAHOO! I let myself feel and understand why I feel the way I do and then speak Truth to that place!
So in the every day...sometimes tears fall faster and then slower other days. If you are with me and the tears come...don't panic! They will stop! Please know though that I don't need you to fix the problem...I don't need you to make me laugh...I don't need you to really say anything. Just sit with me...hand me a Kleenex and wait until or if I'm ready to share my heart! My tears are ok and they are just pieces of my heart coming out through my eyes. If you still don't understand then that's ok...because my Jesus understands! He will always invite me/us to "Cry, Baby!" Isn't that the best gift?
To my fellow feeler,
I give you permission to cry! Let the tears come! It is not weakness...it is strength! Embrace the gift that has been given to us to feel deeply! Don't write off those who don't feel like you...or maybe even misunderstand you! Stop ignoring and shrugging off this beautiful gift that we have been given! CRY, BABY...IT'S OK!
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