Forgiveness.

 When I was in my early teens there was this show on CTV called “Twice In A Lifetime” Each episode began with someone dying than standing before a judge and they would reveal video clips of moments in the person’s life of joy and of mistake. The person would then see the mistake as the reel of their life was played and an angel would plea on their behalf for a second chance to go back and fix the wrong and get a second chance at living their life. At the end the person would be different and live different than the first as relationships would be made right, mistakes would be recognized and forgiveness given. Though I know the sequence of end of life to be different from the plot of the show there’s something I am processing lately that reminds me of the show.

I also am listening to a book through audio that speaks about how God comes in and heals past memories as we open them up to Him. As I contemplate moments of hurt towards me that people are aware of and even of the ones they aren’t, it feels as though me and God are replaying the clips of my life. I have opened myself way up to Him and realized there is so much goodness here even in feeling the hurt again. The heart of God works so much differently and bigger than we know. He doesn’t just give us a second chance but gives us new memories that heal the hurt. 

Forgiveness has been about walking through a lot of wilderness for me. Many of the hurts I’ve experienced are deeper than I realize sometimes but as I continue to walk towards freedom and see what I’ve done and what people have done to me than it is easier to let go of and find deep soul healing.

As a Christian I am called to forgive. This does not mean I let people go on hurting me or say that what they’ve done to me is always right. Forgiveness is a gift—a mercy and though I don’t always find it easy as I sit with God who is my gentle healer it gets easier as I revisit some of the most hurtful moments of my life. It’s not  as hard to extend forgiveness anymore. Some things in life you can go back and make right—a lot of times you can’t even if you could write 1000 apology letters. So what am I saying? How do we practice forgiveness? Most of us go through life not realizing we’re hurting or that we’ve hurt others I think a posture of humble prayer through a daily or weekly examen for me has been helpful and getting comfortable with confessing to each other and even to God when I feel hurt. This means that I get brave to tell someone when they’ve hurt me, but also be courageously humble enough to realize that I have hurt someone else whether intentional or not, deserved or not. 

May we have hearts that are brave enough to walk in true authentic forgiveness and may the prayer of “Lord, have mercy, Christ have mercy” be not far from our hearts and lips. May God give us the grace to forgive and heal.

“Therefore, I tell you, her sins, which are many, are forgiven—for she loved much. But he who is forgiven little, loves little.”