Too Busy

Days lately found me being very selfish! Summer is here and with it came some feelings that were not ok, but they are real! In a world where you are defined by what you DO rather than who you ARE...we become people who strive, struggle and feel like they are not enough. Always trying to keep up with her or just wishing that they had the confidence or gifts that she carries within her. Combine all of that with a physically limited body and those lies can become deeply rooted!
A few days ago I was sitting thinking and feeling very sorry for myself...it seems very selfish to even type this, but can I just declare to the world that I am messed up...and so let me take off my mask,ok?!
I was whining to God about how everyone in my life seemed to be too busy to notice me...too busy to need me...too busy to validate and applaud me...too busy to spend time with me! (WHOA! Selfish much?!) I said, "God why is everyone too busy for me?" His gentle Papa voice then whispered..."Oh,but you sweet girl, you have been too busy for ME!"
Phew! I knew it then that the only One whose voice I needed to validate me...the. ONE I needed to spend time with was Him!
So I packed up and headed to meet Jesus at the hotel this weekend! I didn't come to get this big grandiose God moment, I didn't come for rest, prayer or Scripture even though those were a part of it...I came to the hotel for Him! He was with me when I napped, read, talked to Him  went for a walk, sat on a quiet bench or in the pool singing Him love songs to correspond with every letter of the alphabet! He was there waiting in the restaurant for our dinner date! He was there telling me to be His...that's all that really matters! He is never too busy for me! HE was just waiting and anticipating time with HIS girl...unforced, unplanned and unhindered! This will not just stop when I leave this hotel, but it will be a rhythm that I pray continues...to rest...to be and to never be too busy...for JESUS!

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